Wednesday, 26 January 2011

Surrender at discretion

It doesn't matter what was wrong and what even could be
I promise to be a good girl
and I will be
you know you are a necessary and the basic component of my dream
you can't disappear
and I can't go away too
it' just without any sense to do

you stay and me too
and we work for new smiles still
I hope I won't make you feel bad again
My dear man
and I understand now
that you have had right
to be so mad

it's you who can chose
the right dream for both not me
until you live here

Tuesday, 25 January 2011

Not the end

You knew it couldn't end up like this
didn't you?

My jealous man :)

Friday, 21 January 2011

"It's Beyond My Control!"

You have had to be really bored of me

So it's you who ruin all in once
with such an ease
I never had so much force in me
To do it

But you know after years
It's not such a tragedy
As it was before

It was not even so hard to delete you from my list
and from my world
That you hate so much right now

Good bye love of my life
I hope you will enjoy
This what you have there
And what you have done

I failed and it seems I am not worth to enter this house
we never really build we never really had

An idle stupid dream
this you and me

Thursday, 20 January 2011

Empty house

There is not love here anymore
So don't come

Tuesday, 18 January 2011

House of love

With you
Even a grand serious LOVE with all its hard rules and consequences
Seems attractive and not scaring at all

and this lack of freedom at our home
you announce
Is like an open gate to the unknown world of wonders so wide
That I never felt outside

It's like enter to real story I was only read about
So far...

Monday, 17 January 2011

The light

So you've been back to turn the light in my world
How beautiful
The witch is gone sweetness came back to my lips and words
And all around can breathe again
With me at home :)

of course we need our dreams to live
they are part of us
just as you are part of me
and when you disappear
I do not exist

Just a shadow of me
Pretends something still
To let them believe
That I am here

Sunday, 16 January 2011

Just a rainy days

It's amazing how every day is different
and how much uncertainty I can still find inside
about you and me, the future or even this moment we live
I feel like this boat I am on and I can't go out is sinking
And I am the main responsible for it
but maybe it was always only me
who was going to drown in all this

They just came here to save me
and I should be strong now
to keep going on this at least as long as they need
There is still not the right time for change
I know
So why this mess inside, why this fight for?

I really don't know

You achieved precisely nothing in fact to do that
Just go on the way you start
There is no way out
So keep smiling and enjoy
That's why you are here
for the sake of god!

And you darling I know you will be back too
We need each other
In some magical way we do
and we live together
Even just in mind and it's fine
You sweet little dream of mine

Don't worry baby I will be fine
It's just at times
This black cloud doesn't let me see things clear enough
but after a rain there is always a sun
so it doesn't matter

It's all right too
if you can't come now or soon
I've learnt to wait
For this what I wish
and in this waiting is also some charm
My sweet full of life man
from the green wonderland
I found out once upon a time

Piss off

There is so many things you should simply enjoy
but you don't

You are so piss off with all
and wish to send everybody to hell
including your self

good that after all you back to your senses again
and it's still like nothing happened

Saturday, 15 January 2011

Wolf and me

Oh I didn't know there is more beautiful wolves
In this world
What a sweet surprise
Yes you bring me smiles

And you amazed me last night
The beauty and power of your sight

And yes I am a bit shy
In my daily life
at times..

If you wanna know

But not when I meet the man
and the wolf

Then I am not
Then I know how to speak
and how to wait too
and how to enjoy


Friday, 14 January 2011

how it works

You effect me
And then I have something to tell
To this world
About a beauty and about love
About a desire and about a betrayal too
About everything what is real and meaningful
All these hidden secrets of the heart flow unwrapped in to the open space
Who knows what they do when I close this box
I don't care too much

Sometimes I feel like someone who after thousand years of silence
suddenly needs to speak

So forgive me
If it is too much to handle
Too much to keep

I don't know the end my self yet...
I create and share to live

But don't worry about my home
In mean time all is going on

Another meal is prepared another day fulfilled
By also sweet little things I share with them
They just ask at times: mom
Why you talk to your self all the time?
and what do you say?
Oh nothing my babies it's just another life
I have inside nothing to worry about
It's just my another world to live by

Finish your dinner now

And you the man who is still beside me
You know that all this what I keep here
Is just an illusion of my mad mind perhaps
You believe that, don't you?

Anyway you look great and I hope that in some way
You are still happy to meet me
Even if I am not ordinary wife to you
But you never cared of things like this as I know...
You knew I am still kind of girl and it's all
Just a fun and a specific type of trip
We decided to start and to keep
Until it is working well for you and me
How long then?
Can you say, can you see?

Oh better to not think of the future now
We are as we are and live as we live so far
Where it leads?
I don't know

I am on the way to unknown
Dreams are dreams
But now is now
The only sure thing
We grab in hand

and this another space another life inside

I am just greedy as always I...
Forgive me and you too
That I have you all
Maybe I shouldn't, who knows?

The balance

At times I am a bit confused
How much lies we need to spread around
To keep all close of us happy enough...

It's also an art to know this
balance between right and wrong weight of illusion...

In life

In life

there is time of fuck

and there is time

of poetry

less interested of this make wars

or other bad things

besides we are all just a voyeurs

of other people life and fantasies

of course in mean time there is plenty other things we do like hard work for living and some daily stuff like making our beautiful children growing up if we have some, keeping family and friends in good or bad mood, but it's nothing what I am talking about right now

this what I mean is us and basic forces that lead us to act

love and hate
and space between
one or another feeling that let us move
in this world

right or wrong

basic things but natural...

I don't know where this smile came from suddenly
in me...
must be again some sweet memory...

♪♫ Nightingale ♫♪

Come lover sacrifice my land
So I could enjoy any stone we pass across
Any house we kissed each other beneath
Any grass we lie down to rest
Any path we walked through holding each other

Any piece of the ground and the air we breath
To remember and to comeback
With a secret embrace to these places

For now they are all useless
No meaningfull enough
To enjoy to remember
To notice they exist at all

So come soon
I am calling you
The way I can
The way I find
Tempting enough
By nightingale I got today
For you

Please come

My love

I am not creative

No my darling man
I am not creative
I just need to tell my story
When something special begins
and it all starts with you
Each time you come
My beautiful open book
My adventure with no other end
Just with you
In your arms again

It's you this sweet raise the roof of my head
I love to have
To move, to scream, to wait

and to show
what I find so beautiful
in this life in this world...

Don't you know?

Thursday, 13 January 2011

Just the spark of your sight

So this is the end for now...
Not a day but maybe a month or a year
of waiting
I was too intense perhaps
So now it's time to calm down

You have gone
Nothing to share
Nothing to live by inside

Just a memory of the spark
and hope

that you will be back

Tuesday, 11 January 2011


It's amazing how easily you make me so hungry so greedy
and one day seems again like an ocean of longing
to have you again the way I need
just for me

The best what you do

The best thing in this what you do
Is the way you make me feel beautiful enough
To wish to seduce you
and this is all I long for
to be like this to you

seductive and beautiful

Dreams come and go

So you worry of anything that could ruin
This relationship we have
It's good to know you care of this
Though we have a bit differnt point of view
for the real danger we can face on the way
I am afraid...

but we both want to keep this alive
and this is good
I shouldnt worry too much
before the time
and just enjoy your presence
in my world
that's all

dreams come when you come closer
but they all die in a moment you are not here
I am not enough selfish greedy and cruel too
to run for them alone

and I know that for you
it'd be a nightmare if I do

so the only place for you and me
is here
I know darling I know my sweet
so don't worry

and dream still
No one ever will know
about you and me
except this place here

but it's only a play garden of my own desires and dreams
so not a big deal

Bad boy

How bad I have to be today
To be exciting for you
My bad boy?

Hard to say all is born in a moment you come
But everybody knows

That being just nice
Is not enough

For this juicy colorful life we go through
to gain new smiles

Monday, 10 January 2011

Love and poems

I love that
Writing another poem for you
is a bit like making love
With the same man from years
and still with the same flame
it comes each day each night each year...

It's an art and love in one
So perfect so fine


I love that
I can still
Enjoy this one single favourite topic
I have from the time I've met you

At times I am just not sure
How much you enjoy
this open love

yes I know this writing on this site
Is like showing me naked one more time
before all who comes to watch us...

but you love a bit naughty things too
so you can enjoy I am sure you do

and I love that I can be mad with you as much as I want
It's quite comfortable

The tree of dreams

A hundred dreams
Come inside
Whenever you touch me
By your beautiful mind

Don't stop


go on
and stay here

so I can feel them
and live enjoying their melody and smell
so easy to touch they are now

like you were here



I love it

and I always will


Do you feel me
On the other side of this screen
So much as I feel you?

Whenever you come closer here and make a single step
I see it
I am the spy in our house of love
I can't help
I see all you do
I almost feel your breath and your thoughts

and I share
I share

as much as I can
until I feel you are so close
and dreams grow up fast in mind
and maybe you hear my thoughts for a while..
and you enjoy

and I wish
I wish
you could stay here
for me

a bit

just a bit

until another dream
I can share
and I can live by

you are here

for me
so close

Wednesday, 5 January 2011

Find your birthday and then find your tree.

This is really cool and somewhat accurate,
also in line with Celtic astrology.

Dec 23 to Jan 01 - Apple Tree
Jan 01 to Jan 11 - Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 - Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 - Cypress Tree
Feb 04 to Feb 08 - Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 - Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 - Pine Tree
Mar 01 to Mar 10 - Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 - Lime Tree
Mar 21 (only) - Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 - Hazelnut Tree
Apr 01 to Apr 10 - Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 - Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr 30 - Walnut Tree
May 01 to May 14 - Poplar Tree
May 15 to May 24 - Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 - Ash Tree
Jun 04 to Jun 13 - Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 - Fig Tree
Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree
Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree
Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree
Jul 15 to Jul 25 - Elm Tree
Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree
Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree
Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree
Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree
Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree
Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree
Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree
Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree
Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree
Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree
Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree
Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree
Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree
Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree
Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree
Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree

(In alphabetical order)

APPLE TREE (the Love)

Quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction,
pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adventurous,sensitive, loyal
in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner,
very generous, many talents, loves children,
needs affectionate partner.

ASH TREE (the Ambition)

Extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive,demanding, does not
care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play
with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes
money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love
and much emotional support.

BEECH TREE (the Creative)

Has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic, good
organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no
unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen
on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc).

BIRCH TREE (the Inspiration)

Vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly, unpretentious, modest,
does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in
nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little
ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.

CEDAR TREE (the Confidence)

Of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents,
of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others,
self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes
to impress others, has many talents,
industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love,
able to make quick decisions.

CHESNUT TREE (the Honesty)

Of unusual stature, impressive, well-developed sense of justice,
fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated
easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts
superior, feels not understood at times,fiercely family oriented,
very loyal in love, physically fit.

CYPRESS TREE (the Faithfulness)

Strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but
doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants
to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates
loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied,faithful,
quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to gain
knowledge, needs to be needed.

ELM TREE (the Noble - mindedness)

Pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to
forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest
and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-
minded, generous, good sense of humor, practical.

FIG TREE (the Sensibility)

Very strong minded, a bit self-willed, honest, loyal, independent,
hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker when wants to be,
loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals, few sexual
relationships, great sense of humor, has artistic talent
and great intelligence.

FIR TREE (the Mysterious)

Extraordinary taste, handles stress
well,loves anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those
close to them,hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes
idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work, rather
modest, talented, unselfish, many friends, very reliable.

HAZELNUT TREE (the Extraordinary)

Charming, sense of humor, very demanding but can also be very
understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active
fighter for social causes and politics, popular, quite moody,
sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise
sense of judgment and expects complete fairness.

HORNBEAM TREE (the Good Taste)

Of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not
egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable
and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgment in
an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy
with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of
its decisions, very conscientious.

LIME TREE (the Doubt)

Intelligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes out, but not
before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones, hates
fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough,
but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to
make sacrifices for family and friends, has many talents but not
always enough time to use them, can become a complainer,
great leadership qualities, is jealous at times but extremely loyal.

MAPLE TREE (Independence of Mind)

No ordinary person, full of imagination and originality,
shy and reserved, ambitious, proud, self-confident, hungers for
new experiences, sometimesnervous, has many complexities,
good memory, learns easily, complicated love life,
wants to impress.

OAK TREE (the Brave)

Robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent,
sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground,person
of action.

OLIVE TREE (the Wisdom)

Loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced,
avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful,calm,
well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free
of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated

PINE TREE (the Peacemaker)

Loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to
help others, active imagination, likes to write poetry, not fashion
conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love
but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, low
self esteem, needs affection and reassurance.

Poplar Tree (the Uncertainty)

Looks very decorative, talented, not very self-confident,
extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant
surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity,
great artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward
philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.

Rowan Tree (the Sensitivity)

Full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw
attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is
both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate,
emotional, good company, does not forgive.

Walnut Tree (the Passion)

Unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic,
aggressive, noble, broad horizon,
unexpected reactions, spontaneous,
unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon
partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist,
very jealous and passionate, no compromise.

Weeping Willow (the Melancholy)

Likes to be stress free, loves family life, full of hopes and dreams,
attractive, very pathetic, loves anything beautiful, musically
inclined, loves to travel to exotic places,restless,capricious,
honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with
when pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in
love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to
make others laugh.

True or not but it's nice what I can read about our trees here and enjoy the fact that we so much compare to each other even if some of this is such a mix now but it's because we are as one...

Tuesday, 4 January 2011

The night is over

I'm so happy you came again
You recognise well
My call in the dark
Then you are
My wolf

Turning tears in to smiles
Just like that
By one snap

So easily you do that

and the night is over

Monday, 3 January 2011

This is a secret place

Please don’t look at these words
With the thin heart
Wrapped in the tight frame of conventions and rules
It’s not a place here for moral support
This is the secret place
We all have in dreams
So better look deeply in to the mirror
Of your soul
And see what it is longing for
Before you say what you think
Of me...

This Mortal Coil - Another Day

If at times I do not play soft enough with you
Forgive me
It’s because
I am always aching without the sight of you
No longer sure of anything
Then thoughts go mad
Playing their battles defending, hitting you
for my own uncerteinty
I feel because you are no longer here

So little I have you
And so much I feel you I see you inside my head

It never change
See my darling so many years it’s still like we just have meet
And it was the beginning of the story
Each day each year the same
Yet so different
But today I learn one more time
How to take pleasure from the silent signs
You give
To let me know you are here still
For me

Me and write

What are you doing there at night?

I set free demons in to the sky

So they can enjoy a little freedom

Are you all right?

Yes all fine

Sunday, 2 January 2011

Better stay away

I think I shouldn't be with you
I shouldn't even think of you

I am too jealous
So obsessively jealous
of any one who comes closer to you
even in few words or in my imaginary
It's sick
I know it..
I never felt this way about anyone
so far

and I come closer too
to one or few

I have to stay away
simply stay away

and wait


for what?


It's so good that
When I'm going in to self madness
Step by step

You in mean time learn
How to be a doctor

So when I'll be in your hands
You will cure me


Do you really want me?

humble words

these are moments when you can feel
that even simple write can be just a part
of your own decay and you still go on

even when you know it is wrong
but in fact the strenght of this act
is visible for you only

and you can't stop it now
because it's just the middle of the way

in your circe of life